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Grand Plans

by
S. Sweet

I had been in this little bar several times in the past but not in a very long time.  It had not changed much though.  The four walls contained the same tattered bar stool, same bartender, only the juke box was new, using CD's instead of those old 45's.  I took a seat in a booth, ordered a drink and sat there sipping it as I fingered the silver duct tape patching.  I was not really looking for company, just trying to capture a bit of my past.  My home town might not have changed over the years but I sure had.  Or at least I thought I had before my high school reunion.  

I was successful, had all that I could want.  I was very self-confident, but throw me in a room with 75 of the people I graduated with and I turned into that shy, scared little girl again, sitting all alone.  Why did I let those people intimidate me?  I was just as good, just as important as all of them, in fact probably more so than most of them.  I lived in a million dollar home, drove an expensive car, wore designer clothing and jewelry, and ran a successful business.  I lived a full and happy life.  Sure, I wasn't married and I didn't have any children, but the fact was I didn't feel I was ready yet.  When I started my family I wanted to have the time to enjoy it, not spend the rest of my life trying to juggle my career and home.  

I had spent the past ten years preparing for that, to be a wife and mother.  I was almost ready for my grand plans.  It was kind of funny, the reactions I had gotten from so many of them, when they asked me what I did, what type of business I ran.  I would just smile and tell them I was diversified, I ran a group of adult entertainment companies.  I had adult entertainment phone lines, a small but productive adult film company, Internet adult service sites, an adult mail order line, and I published an adult monthly with photo layouts and lots of juicy fiction for the subscribers.  Most of them were shocked speechless, with the exception of the one guy who had become a minister.  He felt compelled to lecture me on the sins of the flesh and the error of my ways.  I laughed and assured him that my career choice was the least of my sins.  I had done things that would curl toes.  The irony of it was that most of them probably wished they had done some of the things I had.  

Sitting there sipping on my third drink and remembering some of my adventures, one thing became painfully obvious, I needed a man.  Maybe not needed as much as wanted.  There was a definite lack of suitable candidates here so I decided to go elsewhere and was about to leave when he entered the bar.  Maybe there was hope here after all.  I went to the bar and ordered my fourth, choosing a place a few seats away from him.  He was gorgeous, with his long dark hair and blue eyes, and very fit body.  He wore no wedding ring, that was a plus.  I wasn't the type of woman to sleep with someone else's significant other.  I might not be married but I knew how I would feel about it if I found someone sleeping with my husband.  He surprised me by moving closer, I had caught him sneaking peeks at me out of the corner of his eye several times. 

Maybe this wouldn't be a totally fruitless weekend after all.  When he seated himself beside me I smiled and said hello.  He ordered another drink and offered me one, I accepted but just a soda.  He introduced himself as Will.  I smiled and told him my name, when I did he laughed and said he just knew it.  He was sure he had known me.  I assured him that if I had met him before I would definitely remember it.  He explained that it was doubtful that I would, the years had been kind to him and he had changed a lot.  I think the expression on my face told him that I thought he was totally crazy.  He explained that we had went to high school together and had been in several of the same classes.  I still could not recall him, he laughed and told me most people used to call him Wiener William!  

The look of disbelief and utter shock was too much for him.  He laughed so hard he had tears in his eyes.  It took me a minute to compose myself and close my gaping mouth.  Saying that the years had been kind to him was an understatement!  He had gone from a pimple-faced geeky runt to a beautiful, beefy hunk!  He was thrilled that I remembered.  I asked why I had not seen him at the reunion.  He had been late, didn't come in until after the dinner.  He had hated that he had missed me.  We had never been close friends in school but I had always been nice to him.  He confessed that he had come to the reunion hoping to run into me.  I was pleased by that little tidbit of knowledge.  I felt giddy inside, like I was sixteen again.  I asked him if he would like to go get a bite to eat since he had missed dinner.  

At dinner we chatted about our lives and what we had done or were doing.  He was a graphics artist, made a comfortable living for himself and had never married, though he did have a three year old daughter full time.  She was with his mother for the evening.  I really admired him for being committed to his child.  He was shocked by the course my life had taken, surprised that the shy sweet little girl he had known before was in the adult entertainment field.  He had a great sense of humor and we were getting along rather well.  He had my full attention.  I wanted him badly and wondered if he was feeling the same electricity.  We had a lot more in common than I would have thought.  

The hour had grown late and I was really tired.  We left the restaurant and he drove me to my hotel, walking me to my door.  He kissed me lightly on my cheek and asked me to breakfast the next morning, explaining he would have to bring his little girl along.  I accepted and told him I would love to meet her.  I confess I was a little disappointed that things had not gone further between us.  I went to sleep easier than I had expected and my dreams were wonderful.  

When he knocked on my door at 8 am the next morning I was still in my robe.  I opened the door, apologizing for my appearance.  I had over slept, guess it was the vodka from the night before.  His daughter was hanging on his leg and peeking at me.  Her name was Lori.  I dropped to my knees and held out my hand to her, introducing myself, trying to put her at ease.  She buried her little nose in the fabric of his jeans and would not answer.  He explained that she was very shy but would warm up to me quickly enough.  I got ready in the bathroom as quickly as I could.  I hated to keep them waiting.  When I came out they were playing a game of peek-a-boo.  She had the cutest little giggle.  For the first time I felt a twinge of remorse at not having any children of my own.  

Breakfast with a three-year-old turned out to be an adventure.  He had been right, she seemed to accept me and included me in her fun, right down to throwing her applesauce in my hair.  He started to scold her, but I just laughed and told him it was fine.  Besides it could have been much worse, maybe pancake syrup.  He wanted to cruise the local mall and pick up a few things for Lori.  I went along, joking that he might need a woman's opinion.  She made it clear that she did not care for the frilly little dresses he showed her, she was more of a pants kid.  I helped him pick out several outfits that suited her, girlish enough to suit him and comfortable enough to suit her.  We went to the shoe store next.  No patent leather slippers for her, she wanted boots, so we picked out a pair in purple leather with tiny embroidered flowers on them.  He confessed he felt better letting me take her into the women's dressing rooms to try things on than when he had to take her into the men's.  I hated the thought of the weekend ending, when just 24 hours ago I had dreaded having to go through it.  We made a day of it, shopping, having lunch at the mall, a petting zoo, a kid's matinee at the theater.  There is nothing like sitting in semidarkness with 50 screaming kids.  I was having a great time.  She fell asleep in the back of the car and he decided to drive up to the lake and let her sleep for a bit.  We stood outside of the car tossing old crackers to the ducks while she rested up for the next round.  He took my hand and pulled me closer, kissing my lips lightly.  I slipped my arms around his neck and returned the kiss.  It was wonderful, he deepened our kiss pulling me closer still.  His hands running down my back to cup my bottom.  I moaned, wanting more, until I heard the squeak of the car door.  We turned to see Lori standing there rubbing her eyes and grinning.  It was time to go.  They dropped me off at my hotel and drove away.  

He and I had a date for dinner that evening.  I took a short nap before getting ready.  My emotions were in an uproar, I felt things that I did not understand. I wanted more than just a casual fling with this guy.  I was fearful that I was allowing myself to fall in love with him and Lori.  Was it just my mothering instincts coming into play?  I hadn't a clue.  I wasn't ready to fall in love, it didn't fit into the plans I had made for my life at this point.  Besides that I lived in California now, a million miles away.  

The loud knock on my door jarred me from my thoughts.  When I opened the door his jaw dropped and he responded with a simple "wow" but it told me I had achieved the look I was going for.  We had a nice dinner and went for a drive back up to the lake. The sun was starting to set, very romantic.  We shared several passionate kisses.  I could feel the heat between us.  Again that little voice in my head was telling me that I wanted more from him than a quick fling.  I pushed him away gently, sighing heavily.  I told him that things between us could go no further than they had.  I sat on the hood of his car and tried my best to explain.  I was feeling things for him and even for Lori that I shouldn't feel.  It wasn't anything he had done, I realized that I wanted more from him than just a roll in the hay and that was just not possible.  He surprised me by asking, "Why not?"  When I looked confused he asked me again, why it wasn't possible for us to have more.  I explained about the my plan for my life and how I wanted things to be when I settled down and started a family.  Finally, I added the fact that I lived clear across the country.  He pulled me close and told me people had to rethink their plans all the time. He continued to say he wasn't as far away as I thought, in fact we probably both lived in the same county.  He had moved to Los Angeles 5 years ago.  I was both thrilled and terrified.  The distance had been the cornerstone of my defense against what I was feeling and now that wasn't an obstacle.  Where would we go from here?  He took me back to my hotel, I had an early flight the next day and needed to pack and get some rest.  He kissed me again and I wrote down my phone numbers and address while he did the same.  He kissed me good-bye and left.  

The flight home was long and very lonely.  I missed him, I missed Lori's tinkling laughter.  When I arrived home my house keeper greeted me excitedly, telling me that I had flowers and Chocolates delivered just an hour before.  The little card said "Lori misses the nice lady and so do I.  Big kiss and a bit of applesauce in your hair, Will and Lori Leigh."  I smiled and a tear slipped down my cheek.  There was no denial, I was in love.  I threw myself into my work, trying not to let the fact that he hadn't called hurt too much, after all I hadn't called him either.  Two weeks later I still had not heard from them, nor had I contacted them.  I had picked the phone up several times only to hang it back up again.  

Saturday evening the phone woke me from one of my rare naps, I answered it to hear a small child's laughter followed by Will's voice asking me if I missed them sufficiently enough yet.  I laughed for the first time in two weeks.  I heard a door bell ringing over the phone and then realized mine was ringing.  I ran down the stairs to find Will standing on my door step with Lori in his arms.  I jerked the door open and wrapped my arms around them both, kissed Lori's cheek and then her dad's.  We spent the remainder of the weekend at my house. He was shocked by its size and decor.  The marble patio with the hot tub and fountains thrilled Lori.  My life became a whirlwind.  I took an extended vacation from my work, letting my competent staff handle things.  The weeks that followed were a blur.  He and Lori swept me off my feet.  

The night he proposed to me wasn't the most romantic but it will forever be etched in my memory.  We were sitting in front of his fire place watching Dumbo with Lori asleep on the sofa, he leaned over and kissed me gently on my lips.  He moved to his knees and took my hand in his, looking into my eyes as he opened the tiny ring box and asked me to be his wife and Lori's mom.  My heart raced, I couldn't hold back the tears.  I wrapped my arms around his neck kissing his cheeks and lips.  I practically shouted when I said yes.  I giggled when Lori rolled over and told me to be quiet.  We were married in our home town.  I made it a large affair, inviting all of our families, a few local friends, several of our California friends.  I wanted everyone to know how happy we were together, that our once dreaded high school reunion could bring about something so wonderful.  They moved into my house.  The once vacant stable now housed three beautiful horses and one pony, my once spotless carpet had Kool-Ade stains on it.  I turned the dusty library into an office for Will and I to share.  I do most of my work from home and he does all that he can there too.  Lori helped me pick out the things to decorate her new room along with her stuff from their old house. I even persuaded her to let me put up lace curtains.  I love the sound of her laughter echoing through the halls.  Dalton was born eight months after we were married and he and Lori now have a brand new baby sister, Grace Marie.  So much for plans and my grand schedule of how I wanted things to happen in my life, but all in all I would have to say things turned out pretty well.  I have hopes that our children's "grand plans" will work out this well.  

 

I am 28 years old, married, and a full-time mother of two.  I formerly worked as a nurse for a local health care company.  I have been writing for years, but until recently, had never submitted any of my work for publication.   I have a short, erotic fiction story being published in the June/July issue of Bordello, a small Australian publication.  Success comes in small steps; at least that's what I keep telling myself.  I love having my work shown on such wonderful sites as The Rose and Thorn.

"Barstool" is available from Jonathon Earl Bowser

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